Leaving Aaron

In August 2004, eight months and a few days before we said goodbye forever, we returned Aaron to Mount Bachelor Academy after a fabulous family weekend. Aaron did not like long goodbyes and he was ready to return to campus earlier than expected. With a bag of dirty clothes, a collection of new books, and a few extra clothes for the fall, Aaron said his goodbye and walked back to check-in.

The drive down to Bend from the hills outside of Prineville, OR was quiet. We stopped at a roadside viewing site to look back toward Prineville and the hills where Aaron called home.

Looking at the photos today I see we were reflecting. For years we had Aaron as a complex, funny, serious, creative, carefree, athletic, and playful boy. In less than 9 months in 2003 we lost him. By August 2004 we had Aaron back. From 8/19-23, Patrick experienced a real brother-brother relationship. I think he was somewhat astounded by the experience...he finally had a brother who could be a big brother. Cathy had her son back. They shared laughs, hugs, tears, and honest conversation. She was seeing her boys be friends and brothers.

My son was safe, articulate, and honest about his insecurities. He was full of a wealth of knowledge about behavior and led us to understand some family dynamic changes we could make. We all saw Aaron was showing a confidence in his self that we had not seen for some time. His mentor told us "No young man has walked onto campus with more integrity than Aaron." We all wished he accepted that assessment as much as we all knew it was true.

On the ride home, I was being "The Dad". Confident, stoic, sure of my actions. Looking through the lens of the camera at Cathy and Patrick reflecting on what they were leaving behind in a son and brother, I thought this might be as hard as it gets for them. In May, 2005 I found out I was wrong. Very wrong.

Wishing I could go back to Prineville and bring Aaron home,

Tom