The movie was made in 1986. Stand By Me. A story about being 12 year old boys and being friends in the 1960's. Aaron and I watched it together when he was younger than 12 wishing he was 12 and I was much older wishing the same.
Being a Dad in the 90's was different than being a Dad in the 60's, at least from my perspective. My Dad friends and I,looking back over the generation agreed dads of the 60's didn't get down on the floor or grass and play with the children like we did. A three foot high barrier existed in our child hood. Dads could bend over to look down at you or crouch to look close to you, but that was the limit. As if they might never get up again, dads of the 60's kept the soles of their shoes firmly planted on the ground when interacting with us. Picnic tables were invented for dads lest they have to stand and eat while Mom's and kids ate on the blanket on the ground.
My friend Tim described it perfectly when Aaron was four and his daughter Claire was five, "Liz scolds me like I'm Claire's brother." I think once our knees touched the ground we became "My Dad-Friend" to our kids. That was OK by me. Playing Peter Pan, Swords, Johnny, Pirates, Green Bay Packers, World Heavyweight Boxing Champions, was fine by me--not for the days without end way that Aaron approached make believe, but long enough to get dirty. I could still play.
The movie Stand By Me ends with Richard Dreyfus keying a story. He ends it by writing, "It's been over ten years since I last saw him. I miss my friend."
Today is three years since I saw Aaron last. In fact, I wrote about him at the time I was hearing his voice in the other room for the final time. You can read that memory in the archives May 8, 2005. Three years. I miss my son-friend. I'm grateful to have my surviving son-friend.
I said his name over and over today. All the different names I called Aaron. Air-Bear. AJ. Air-foil. A-GEE. AGE. A-Ron. Aaron John. Aaron Johnny. I miss calling out his name. I miss our conversations. I remember watching movies with him. I remember. Stand by me Air-Bear. Ben E. King Sang Stand by Me
Love you.
Dad
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