A Son Turns 19

He walked in to the movie and I was watching for him at the door. The son I was looking for was younger and less assured than the young man who caught my attention. "Is that Patrick?" I asked and looked closer. This morning I picked up a chubby old book of quotations off of the shelf. When the pages of this grandfather last saw the light of day I don't know. Something stated and recorded generations ago would surely speak to me from the yellowed pages on Patrick's nineteenth birthday and I watched for it.

"Let the boy earn his spurs."  Edward III reached out across eternity to speak the words I sought. We can't always sit down with our wise elders to hear paternal advice but if I am open to hear what God wants me to hear I always get the message. Cut me with a knife and it will not hurt half as much as seeing a son battered about by life's blunt forces. Rush in to defend, destroy the evil, or drag the boy to safety is the instinctual way. Instincts of preservation of a child's life has a time and then we must set aside our physical strength for emotional, spiritual growth, and let go. Letting go is the more challenging.

Life doesn't ask us if we are ready to become men; we are challenged and the answer is obvious. Initiation has no rules. On May 13, 2005 God touched Patrick and I saw him answer with yes. From that day on he walked a little more determined although. While Patrick was more alone, he was never isolated. With more insight into life and death, Patrick explored, contemplated, battled, struggled, recovered his footing, and carried on.

Today Patrick turned 19 and when he walked in to the theater I did not recognize him although the face looked familiar. I knew it was my son when I heard the sound of spurs. I'm grateful for the times I did not rush in. Those were the times when I let God be with me.

Love you PT. Happy Birthday.

Dad